• Daily life

    Double Nickels

    This is what my cousin called turning 55. I hadn’t thought of this before but maybe it’s because I’ve been away from nickels for too long. :) She is only five months older than me so we reach these milestones close together. Anyway, yesterday was my 55th birthday. I guess I am another year older and wiser. At least I hope so.

    It was a low-key kind of day in the end. The Scientist has been working many extra hours the past week for a project that’s about to be demo’ed. Still, he managed to take some time off in the late-afternoon and evening. He made a lovely cake for me, complete with my name and strawberries. It was very yummy. For dinner we had takeout food from an Ethiopian place we hadn’t visited for quite a while. My favorite thing there is a sampler of five different vegetarian foods with two injera pancakes. It was the first thing I’d tried from there and I still get it because it’s just too hard to decide on a single thing.

    I spent the day playing Animal Crossing, for the most part. I was really getting into it and have built up quite a bit of my little island now. But I have lots to go. I have heard stories of people fast-forwarding time to get things done more quickly but I honestly don’t see the fun in that at all. I learned my younger brother’s family is also playing so maybe we can connect and visit each others’ islands…

    It’s weird to think I’m on the climb towards sixty now.

  • Family,  Memories

    Childhood to adulthood

    It seems appropriate to again recall the events of this day and night from eighteen years ago.

    I reached the last week of my official forty weeks of pregnancy and I found myself being shifted from the relaxed atmosphere of the family birth center we’d been attending into the regular maternity clinic in the main hospital. What a difference it was to go into the big, noisy clinic and have to sit for an hour on uncomfortable seats when I was quite swollen and had elevated blood pressure. I don’t really recall much about the actual appointment. It was all a blur. The upshot was that I was to be induced the next day and was expected there by late morning.

    On the morning of the 18th, we piled into the car and I recall stopping for a bit of breakfast at the drive through at McDonald’s of all places. Before I knew it was I checked into the hospital and put in a room. At some point some treatment to start the induction was given and even that I don’t really recall. I do recall sitting around there all afternoon with the Scientist, waiting for something to happen. At some point I was given further treatment and then we waited and waited. I remember drinking Milo (a powder chocolate drink) at some point. Nothing happened and then it was night and I think there must have been a third treatment. And then the Scientist went home as it was quite late and who knew how much longer it would be.

    At some point in the next hour, around 11pm, I got up to go to the toilet and it was there my waters broke unexpectedly. To that point, nothing obvious had happened to me but now it was all happening at once. Contractions started and just didn’t stop, one after another. The Scientist was dragged from bed almost immediately after he’d reached it and returned to my side within a short time although it seemed like ages to me. I  was offered an epidural and refused as I thought I would surely be able to handle a few hours of labor. After a few hours of constant contractions, I suddenly was desperate for the epidural but I was too far along so they offered pethidine instead. I don’t believe that made any dent into the pain but I did get some relief from the nitrous oxide for short bursts of time. Later on I did get the epidural after all as I’d tired so much from non-stop contractions for so many hours. I honestly don’t recall how long it took for the birth to happen once I started pushing but it eventually required some assistance. Possibly I wasn’t feeling enough sensation to push effectively. At 11am my future game fanatic finally made it into the world and was soon making a big noise.

    The next couple of days are a blur in my memories now. They consisted of sleeping whenever I could and feeding and feeding and a crying baby. Game Fanatic and two other little boys were all born that day and all kept the midwives busy with cuddling crying babies in an effort to let us moms get a bit of sleep once in a while. And then it was time to go home and we dressed him up in his little green suit and the Scientist drove us back home.  The next few months are a blur of sleepless days and nights, feeding and changing nappies (diapers). Feedings became quite painful and I was miserable enough that the Scientist suggested formula to give me a break. But I persisted through the pain and we eventually seem to work things out.

    Before I knew it, I had a crawling baby who soon was standing and then he was walking. And while achieving these marvelous feats, he also started talking and shared his insights with us regularly. Then it was a first birthday and he had chicken pox! Over the next year he would speak in complete sentences and eat his first chili (by mistake) and develop a love for the hot and spicy foods he eats today. When he was three he started kindy and the next year pre-primary and before we knew it he was school age. Fast forward a few more years and he’d grown quite tall and his voice changed and he suddenly was a teenager. And here we are on the verge of eighteen. He’s a fascinating young adult now and I can’t wait to see what happens next for our baby.

    Every year for his birthday, Game Fanatic makes a birthday list to give us so that he always gets what he wants for his birthday instead of something disappointing. This year his list consisted only of games, some which he will be receiving. But I have a special surprise for him. Well maybe not that much of a surprise as I jokingly mentioned it a while back to him. With the Scientist, I’ve chosen a handful of favorite books from his childhood and bought copies for him to keep as mementos.

    • The Very Hungry Caterpillar -He had a board book as a baby and toddler and he loved to hear this book read again and again. The copy I ended up with via mail order is a tiny version of the book so I’m not sure how he will like it. I suspect he will prefer to have a slightly bigger copy as this one fits a bit too neatly into his hand.
    • Hairy MacLary from Donaldson’s Dairy– This book is the first in a series of books containing the lovable dog, Hairy MacLary. In truth the book we’d read first was about another character, Scattercat, or maybe it was Slinki Malinki. They are all gentle, rhythmic books and Game Fanatic loved all that we read. We never owned our own copy so I thought it was time he had his own to keep forever.
    • There’s a Hippopotamus on our Roof Eating Cake– Another preschool favorite that is the first in a series of books about a little girl and her favorite imaginary friend, a hippopotamus, who gets up to some great silliness and fun.
    • Greek Myths by Marcia Williams- I think this may have been the first book Game Fanatic read about Greek myths. It’s done in a sort of comic style with lots of illustration and he adored this book so much that he regularly checked it out of the library. I think this will be more of a surprise than some of the other books as he was so much older when he read it.
    • The Three Billy Goats Gruff– This one was a bit hard as there are so many versions available and we’d have likely read more than one to Game Fanatic when we were not relating the story from memory. Eventually the Scientist spotted one that seemed familiar so we chose that one. We are still waiting for this one to arrive and hopefully will have it next week.  Of all the stories from his childhood, this was Game Fanatic’s favorite and he asked for it to be told again and again whether we had a copy of the book or not. We would go to the park for little ones and he would insist on us acting it out using the bridge that connected the two pieces of equipment. The park still has that same equipment and I am often reminded of the repeated performances passing by there with the dogs. I think this one will also be a bit of a surprise but hopefully will keep that special memory alive for him.

    It’s nearly midnight and I need to make some brownies before I go to bed. I’d had aspirations of making a lemon tart but never got the recipe started so it will have to wait a bit longer, I guess. Here’s to a very special day tomorrow  and many special days in the future for my baby, who is now an adult.

  • Asperger's and Autism

    My amazing son

    I cannot believe the amazing things done by Lego Lover in recent times. He has made so many leaps in his social interaction that it’s very much like having an almost different child. Emphasis is on almost.  Several weeks ago we were at a family lunch and the normal behavior for Lego Lover is to keep a wide berth between himself and just about everyone else. This has always been especially true for the cousins. This particular weekend was the occasion of my nephew’s birthday and it just so happened he received two different Lego sets. Enter Lego Lover and his expertise with Lego. What eventuated was a certain amount of interaction between Lego Lover and the cousins. We adults all watched with dropped jaws as he carried on some conversations. It continued to be amazing because he joined in at the playground for a bit and then sat comfortably with his cousins on the swing out on the back patio for awhile.

    We thought this could have been a one-off event but it was repeated to some degree not long afterwards as we visited the home of the cousins. Only the uncle and the two younger cousins were at home but Lego Lover again joined in with some of the play and was very comfortable. I think Lego Lover must have allowed some of his self-imposed restraints to be eased a bit on that first time and so he has had more confidence since then. We’ve not had a further occasion for him to visit with his cousins but I feel somewhat assured that he will continue to be more at ease in their presence, at the very least.

    So this brings me up to a visit last week with another boy with Asperger’s. Lego Lover has “met” this boy a few times in the past but would never have anything to do with him. The other boy recently started homeschooling and his mum has been in regular contact in hopes of working out some sort of relationship between the boys. We didn’t have any particular expectations on the first visit but we made sure both had their Nintendo devices and their Pokemon games. The other boy has problems understanding about personal space and was a bit too far into Lego Lover’s space at first. But after a while both were playing their games and eventually talking to each other. Again, I was quite please but it was a jaw-dropping moment. That’s not to say all went smoothly. The other boy has a whole collection of cheats he has used to level his Pokemon to what I guess is the highest level. Lego Lover isn’t happy with that and refused to battle him after a while due to the unfair advantage carried by the other boy. It wasn’t an issue that was immediately resolved but we two mothers mediated to some degree. It worked out to be a learning experience for both. We are hoping to have regular meetings of the two boys and they have now exchanged a couple messages by email.

    As a side note, I would also like to point out the amazing thing the other boy did. We went into the cafe at the park and this boy went up to the counter on his own, ordered his serving of chips (fries) and paid on his own. He did a beautiful job and was extremely polite.  He was on his own, with me just behind him in case help was needed. It was also very impressive.