A while back I posted about my rollercoaster emotions, particularly the extreme anger I felt after family members posted some things on Facebook that triggered me. I didn’t quite clarify the big button presser in this situation, which was one post was patently untrue. I replied to it with correct information on the item and this started a lengthy tirade about a bunch of things, that mostly only slightly connected with the post anyway. Another person backed up the poster and I completely disengaged from the whole discussion.

I also forgot to mention how a visit to Fremantle helped me calm down to a reasonable level. This was a week after Rhianna died and we hadn’t been out and about all that much. I think I had reached a point where I needed to get away and chill. Going to Fremantle was quite soothing in the end. It took quite a while to let go of a lot of emotion but it did slip away eventually. I think the exposure to the sea was the most soothing part of the trip. It made me feel much more human again, after feeling totally wrong for so many days.

Since then, I still get angry from time to time, but I have managed to teach myself to let it go more easily. Sometimes it’s a matter of fighting the negativity with something positive, which is what I had to do. There was Thanksgiving soon afterwards and it was important that I not allow it to be sullied by the bad feelings. I found my most direct way of dealing with it was engaging in a positive way with those that had upset me. It made me feel better about the world to do that intead of carrying the negative emotions.

I suspect there will be many instances in the near future where I will be tested but I hope to never lose the plot the way I did before. It was a feeling inhabiting my being that was definitely unwanted!